I have developed a problem.
I
I cannot stop buying beads.
Gorgeous, luscious, luminous, gemstone beads. Not the kind from Michael’s or local craft stores, the kind you have to order online, or even better- get at a gem show.
There is one twice a year at a convention center in KC, and it holds vast row upon row of enticing beads. Also, crystals, rocks, and fossils. Oh and dinos.
I went with a friend on Friday, bought way too much, then went back on Sunday with a Grandfairy who was visiting from NC and bought too much once again.
But can you seriously, ever, say “too much” when it’s about art supplies? Art supplies are necessities, not indulgences!
Won’t these pendants add a special bit of wonderfulness to some beaded necklaces?
Here are more pendant type bits too. I’ll put the stone mushrooms and a few of the other things on leather cords, a couple on chains. But most will be used in my creations.
While by my sister in the hospital, I made many, many bracelets. And at Sissy’s house I’d bead necklaces in the evening after spending days with Bobbie. We all adore crafting jewelry and before she got sick, Bobbie made even more bracelets than I did. Beading will always make me feel connected to her, and I was emotional walking into the gem show. The last time I’d been to one was in Indiana with my family last year.
So I was slightly amuck while shopping. (We are all fans of Hocus Pocus, and when we were all leaving our phones places, forgetting things, saying dumb stuff, we’d say we were a mess. Then, Sissy said, no, we are amuck! So that’s what we call this grieving/stress brain fog- we are all amuck amuck amuck like the Sanderson sisters.)
At the convention center, I might have gotten weepy at times. And I did some dumb things. Like when gathering up handfuls of rings at wholesale to retail in my booth, I included my wedding rings in with the bag of silver ones. Luckily, the cashier caught what I’d done and was honest. Even sweet about it. When I tearfully told him about losing my sister, he was very kind.
Yes, I weep to strangers about her.
See how easily I almost lost my own rings? I pulled them off with the others. I’m glad I decided to purchase them instead of putting them down and walking away. I might have put my own rings with the others as I left the booth.
I’m giving myself some grace right now, having a sister shaped hole in my heart makes me sorta unstable. Or as we say, amuck. I’m constantly on edge, and anything at all can make me cry. From something cute I see, to a touching moment in a movie, to seeing the aftermath of wreckage on the road (the loss those people must be feeling!), or just a pretty pile of beads, I cannot be trusted to stay calm.
But I’m owning those tears. And not apologizing. Bobbie earned each and every one.